It’s been a hard week. There are several reasons, including another trip to the ER with a baby who is particularly susceptible to croup. But the thing that hit me the hardest, was the news that one of my dearest friends had to say goodbye to her son, who is close to my age. It’s hard for lots of reasons. Because I knew him, because I remember the seemingly charmed life he had when he was young, and how I looked up to him and maybe even had a little crush on him when we were kids. Because I also know of some of the deep pain he experienced as an adult. He leaves behind a wife, children ranging from 8-20, a brother, a father and a mother. It’s that last one that’s getting me especially right now. Because she is family, and because I’m a mother too. And although, thankfully, I can’t even begin to fathom how it feels to lose a child, I can understand the depths of love that a mother’s heart experiences.
There is nothing I can do to take the pain away from their family. But what I am doing is looking on my ‘hard week’ with a little perspective. I happened on this inspirational piece of art, a list of favorite things written by a mother who knew she was dying. It was originally written in a notebook, and then made into art by her daughter, who wants to be reminded of it every day. So to focus my heart on the blessings, here are a few of my favorite things: (note: since i’m doing this as personal therapy, feel free to scroll to the end for cute brendan videos)
Every single thing about being a mother
Cargo ships sailing out to sea
Back to school supplies
My Mom’s spaghetti and meatballs, eaten wearing the striped bibs
Rainy days
Dad’s shaving songs
The way Chelsea smells when she’s sleeping
Cheese, bread and ‘a plate of things’
Eating candy corn and peanuts, watching football and checking fantasy football scores
Scattered fall leaves
Halloween Haystacks
Cappuccino on a swing in Tuscany
Earnest and authentic people
Sea horses, jelly fish and octopus
Sailboats with Christmas lights
Stickers
Spreadsheets
A stack of magazines and a mani/pedi
People that love you no matter what
The first days of vacation
Lingering in a coffee shop or wine bar
Saturday morning, or Sunday night waffles
The boardwalk in Miami
Meredith
Pumpkins
My son taking my hand and leading me anywhere
Coming home
Smelling flowers
My mother-in-law’s antipasto
Napping in a beach chair
My wedding day
Pj’s and warm blankets
Marshmallows
My husbands brown eyes
A matinee with a bucket of popcorn and a giant drink
Barns with meandering cows
When Brendan wakes up laughing
Colored pens and pretty paper
Weddings and first birthday parties
Lying on a blanket to watch clouds or shooting stars
The stillness of a sunrise
Socks
Planning and predictability
Looking at pictures
Going out for breakfast
Sushi at Tsunami
When we would go to the cabin
Hydrangeas
Strings of twinkly lights
Snuggling
The way Lisa and I can talk about anything
Long drives with car snacks
Brave kindness
My Mom’s birthday cakes
Drinks with umbrellas
Things that sparkle
Hooky days
Spa massages
Warm Grandma rolls with butter
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Wisteria petals all over the ground
Tulle
Love notes
A cool breeze
Having best friends and uncles who live next door
Hooded sweatshirts
The smell of the ocean
Sleeping in
My husband telling me everything is going to be okay
Snow clinging to trees
Getting an email from my Dad, or a text from my father-in-law
Picnics and flying kites
Crossing everything off my to do list
Children’s artwork
Integrity and humility
Brendan’s hugs and kindness
Pinterest
Balloons, confetti and streamers
Memories of a magical childhood
Owls hooting at dawn
Finding the perfect gift
Sunlight on vineyards
Converse tennis shoes
Out on the deck of a cruise ship at sea, or pulling into port
Chips and salsa and margaritas
Bunting
My Dad hiding valentines all over the house for me
Dim sum and a pot of tea
In season fruit
Blossoms on trees
Hammocks
Candy in glass jars
The sound of palm trees in a tropical breeze
Bakeries that use boxes and bakers twine
Corned beef and Leprechaun Pie
Traditions
Morning Glories
Red lipstick
Southern hospitality
The right music
Unexpected letters and packages
Breakfast and all day coffee at the Hampton Inn
Shoe sales
Candles and fires in the fireplace
Being seasonally appropriate
Bocce ball, bean bag toss and BBQ’s
Rocks and seashells
Dessert
And sharing with the puppy, even when you don’t feel good: